No help for singles – 2

I want to clarify some things about my last post:

It wasn’t a pity-party.  The post was to demonstrate the missing instruction and teaching that those with the experience – those who are older – should be providing.  If the people who are family through Jesus do not act like family, do not show love for one another as family, what is the difference between Christians and heathens?

A new commandment I give unto you, that you love one another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another.  By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another.    –  John 13:34-35

Beloved, if God so loved us, we ought also to love one another. No man hath seen God at any time. If we love one another, God dwelleth in us, and his love is perfected in us.    –  1 John 4:11-12

Where is this love?  Is there someone who cares about those who need help?  Everyone starts out single; no one starts out married.  So, shouldn’t there be some real and meaningful help for everyone?

I’m not complaining.  It is what it is.  However, there is something that can still be done – help each other and those whom have not reached the stages in life that you already have.  I have been through these stages and problems and am giving my report on the situation.  I have also given a way to resolve this issue.  It is time for others to step in and help or there be a continual downward spiral into the abyss that the heathens have already entered and learned the hard way.

For more reading:


No help for singles

No one helps the single people.  Pre-posts:,

As a completely single Christian guy, there are two problems I face:

  1. Properly living as a Christian single person.
  2. Finding a proper Christian girl to marry.

How does one properly live a single life?  It’s generally summed up as “don’t have sex, read the Bible more, and pray more.”  Sometimes they might say “get a hobby”, but it’s hard to get a hobby by yourself.  Sure you can do a hobby by yourself, but first you have to start the hobby – at the very minimum, instructions are needed.  Also, what hobby?  Choices have to be presented for one to make a choice.  You also have to be capable of doing the hobby – no legs means no hiking or playing paintball.  For me personally, it would be nice if they suggested a hobby that they actively participate in.  What about the times when you can’t do your hobby or taking a break, or the times you are with strangers or friends, or the many other possibilities?

What if you just can’t live single without constantly stumbling?  Well, there is marriage.  So, how do I find a girl to marry?  Well, you talk to them and get to know them.  If you like each other then you date and get to know each other better before asking her to marry you.  So, you have to wait an unspecified amount of time before I can ask her?  Before that, I could end up in the friend-zone before I even have a chance?  Wait, even before that, where are they?  The ones I would have liked to marry are already married or dating, and not all the girls are in a position that I could even begin a conversation with them.  Like the ones who leave soon after the end of a church service.  “Before you leave, would you like to go on a date?”  Does anyone make a suggestion, or introduction?  It sounds like instructions on getting hit by an asteroid.

Where’s the brotherly and sisterly love that is supposed to be shown?  If no one helps me, don’t expect me to play by, or even know, the “rules”.

Follow Through Regardless Of Influence

And when then saw him, they worshiped him: but some doubted.   — Matthew 28:17

In this context, Jesus has risen from the dead and shown himself to some of those who knew him.  However, even some of the ones who knew him and saw him still doubted his resurrection and him.  Jesus did not let this change him in any way but continued on as he had been.  He continued on to heaven and has become the mediator between us and God, just as he said.  He brought God’s spirit into the world for all mankind, just as he said.  He fulfilled the law, just as he said.

Jesus is the epitome of the manly man; the ultimate example we should follow; and truly, He is the only example we should mirror.

Marriage Is Not An Accident

Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you:  – Matthew 7:7

And I say unto you, Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you.  – Luke 11:9

Marriage will never be an accident: It Probably Isn’t Going To “Just Happen”.

If you want a wife, marriage, kids, or whatever, you have to go and find it – very, very few people are hit by asteroids.

Stand firm

I’d like to start by referencing a post by Justin Campbell:  Quit Being Nice

A man needs to discover what he believes and stand firm for it.  Who a person is nor what a person is should affect his stance.

Every masculine man desires to have a domain of his own.  This can cause his demise if he does not rule his domain.  Any leniency creates momentum in the wrong direction.  A house without a firm foundation will not stay when a storm comes.

It is masculine men that create the structure of the society that they live in.  A masculine man build a castle with thoughts of war in mind.  A masculine man builds an empire for the continuing of generations.  A masculine man will stand firm in the face of any adversary – no matter who the adversary may be.

Against The Current

A little story I’d like to reference:


What should you do?  Who should you be?  Why are you asking me?  A man decides for himself what he will do and who he will be.  He is not enslaved to another’s puny imagination.

The masculine man has the strength and determination to make choices and decisions on his own, for himself.  He also has the commitment to follow through with those choices and decisions.

The way of the masculine man is a powerful one.

Always forward

I’ll start with a good post from Sunshine Mary:

And a scripture:

I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus.  [Philippians 3:14]

You can’t run backward as fast as you can run forward; and you can’t pull as strongly as you can push.  When Paul speaks to the Ephesians about putting on the armor of God, he does not mention anything about the back – no back plate.  Going straight to the other side of a river will get you there faster than following the current.  A battle is ended quickest by marching forward.  It is hard to stand against a raging current, but it is even harder to stop after a slip.  Time only flows in one direction.

The masculine man apologizes for his mistakes and corrects his errors; however, he does not retreat or back down or withdraw.  If he has been going in the wrong direction, he only changes his course.  In Chinese martial arts, there is a concept called “absorbing the blow”.  It is a technique of allowing a strike to enter and then absorbing it in order to draw in an opponent for a decisive counter strike.

Moving forward is the only way for a man to grow, to become strong, to succeed, to conquer, to be masculine.

The path of the masculine man

As the Bible teaches that God’s children are in the world but not of the world(John 15:19John 17:13-16), so too is the masculine man a man but not any man.  The masculine man chooses his path and is careful when others walk with him so that he is not drawn from his way and enslaved by another’s bonds.
Whether he leads, follows, partners, or separates, he chooses each and every step he makes.  If he does make a wrong turn or stumbles over something in his way, he corrects the mistake and learns from it.  The masculine man does not see the insurmountable obstacle as an insurmountable obstacle but as an opportunity to become stronger and more powerful.
The unmasculine man does not not attempt to overcome an obstacle that is too tough for him at that moment.  He does not gain strength from the obstacle or by other means.  An unmasculine man does not follow the best path, or even the good path, but the path easiest to travel.
Robert Frost (1874–1963).  Mountain Interval.  1920.  The Road Not Taken
However, a masculine man also avoids paths paths that are dangerous.  The dangerous path is slippery and precarious.
The masculine man must be strongest against not those who would lead wrong or leave him but those who would stay – that they would divert his direction by continual persuasion.